Food for Ninjas

Epicurious George has, as always, a point: the Orange is a delightful treat for taste buds skirting the edge of sleep. And without eyes in the back of its head, it is easy prey for the sluggish ninja. However, for those seeking a more impressive medium with which to display their skill, might we recommend a collaboration?

For this recipe you will need to subdue:

2 pears
1/2 watermelon
1/2 cantaloupe
1 cucumber
1 fistful Basil

With:

Two knives
Deadly Speed

Chop, scoop, and dice your way through your foe. Combine pleasingly, and perhaps rub a little lemon juice into the wounds. Enjoy.

While it cannot be denied that the shuricado is a whirlwind of simplicity and kickass, and it is true that revenge is sweet, and goes well with a side of ice cream, there are times when the ninja requires a less ephemeral solution. Not to put too fine a point on it: there are times when a ninja needs to eat lunch.

 This little miracle of a dish will help you do just that: Feta cheese reminiscent of snowfall blankets summer fruits nestled in grains and seasoned with the peppery flavor of fresh basil. If you are a devotee of the bento tradition in search of a well packed meal, we believe that this self contained dish, whose flavors intensify with time, will leave you fulfilled and ready to face the oncoming foe.  

You will need:

1 cup Bulgar or Quinoa (or whichever grain the peasants are paying you in these days)
2 cups Water 
5 Fresh Tomatoes
Salt

1 Onion
Olive Oil
Cooking wine (red for preference)

3 peppers the color of your true love’s heart 

One cup fresh basil, corsely chopped
3 cloves garlic, diced
Feta cheese 

Glass baking dish. 

First:

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.

Seed and chop the tomatoes. Sprinkle with salt, and let them stand for about 15 minutes in a colander to drain. 

Next:

Add the bulgar to the water, and simmer, covered, for 15 minutes until cooked through. 

Meanwhile:

Cut the peppers in half lengthwise, removing the seeds and veins. If you wish, you can prepare the peppers by simmering them gently in water until they are tender, but not too soft. Chop the onion and saute in the olive oil until glassy. Add a splash of wine and stir briefly to deglaze the pan. Transfer the onions to the glass dish and arrange the peppers on top. Place in the oven and bake until the stuffing is ready. This will allow the onions to flavor the peppers. 

Saute the garlic in more olive oil to release its aroma. Transfer the cooked bulgar to the pan and toss in the tomatoes. Cook, stirring frequently, until the tomatoes are heated through and begin to cook down. Add the fresh basil and heat until wilted, about 2 minutes. Remove from heat and transfer the stuffing to the peppers. If you have not precooked the peppers, bake the entire dish at 350 for 45 minutes. Sprinkle with feta cheese and place in the oven to broil, about 3 minutes. 

Serve, or save for a time when you aren’t actively engaged with the enemy.

This is the ronin of sauces: a masterless warrior in plain dress who wanders the land in search of hoodlum, inferior tomato sauces to gracefully decapitate. And, let’s not lie: those crappy, second rate canned sauces had it coming. For that matter, so does any other dish that’s trying to convince you it’s the best thing in town. This sauce will judo your meal preferences so hard and fast you’ll swear you never even saw it move. Yeah, that’s right. The secret’s in the simplicity.

Ingredients

8 ripe tomatoes (I used a mix of plum and roma), diced
1 red onion, finely chopped
3 cloves of garlic, minced
1-2 Tbs. balsamic vinegar
1 bunch of basil leaves, finely chopped (you want about half a cup chopped)
1 glug of olive oil
1 pat of butter
Red pepper flakes (optional)
Salt and pepper (to taste)

Method

Spoon Ship in Tomato Sea

Put a saucepan on medium heat. Toss in your glug of olive oil and your pat of butter. Let the butter start to melt; when it just begins to foam, throw in your garlic and stir for a minute. If butter or garlic looks like it’s going to brown or burn, turn down your heat. Toss in the onions and a good grind of salt and stir several minutes until they are just translucent. Add your tomatoes, balsamic vinegar, about a third of the basil, and the red pepper flakes (if using). Give a good grind of salt and pepper, stir and reduce the heat to a simmer. Allow the tomatoes to release their juices, and then cook down into a nice, colorful sauce—about 10 minutes. Right before serving, toss in the remaining basil and adjust salt and pepper to taste. Serve over pasta, and destroy.